Joy to the World

We were talking at work about a friend whose very young grandchild is terminally ill and we were expressing sympathy for the family.  A comment was made that it was going to be tough to make christmas happy for the dying child's older sibling.  This made me stop and pause.
 

How many people do I know whose christmas is unhappy?  Many.  The recently widowed women doing this alone for the first time, a man whose wife is in hospice, another whose mother died this week, families who cannot travel and be together, families that can be together but hate it, families with children who are making terrible choices, a car accident that is eating up the gifts budget and more, the degenerative disease slowly shutting down a god-fearing man, the people who get depressed because they never see the sun.  And that is just among my circle, let alone a complete city bombed to rubble near Bethlehem. Tragedy and trouble is not suspended on December 1.
 

How do we make christmas happy for them? More bling and blow-up snowmen on the roof? Send an annual letter effectively saying “My life is better than yours”? Doesn't ring true does it?  The trouble is, we don't have the resources to fix their problems.

So maybe we just write them off.  Christmas happy is only for those whose lives are perfect, right?  The rest of you can just go away and not spoil our fun.  However, that will leave no one doing christmas happy, because I have never met a person whose life is perfect.

What did the Angel mean, then, when he said “I bring you good news of great joy, that will be for all the people”?  All people? Good guys and bad guys, people with different political opinions, different skin tones, different bank balances, different zip codes?

Yes, all people: because the news was “Jesus!”  The creator become man, the answer to sin, the fulfilment of prophecy, the ultimate prophet, priest and king, the God who has deigned to talk to us face to face.

So what?

Because joy is not in stuff, relationships or religion.  It is in a relationship with Jesus.  Nothing else is as important.  Joy is in reach for all of us hurting, grieving, struggling people because He was born.  He has promised and is able to meet all our needs (not wants) and He will never leave us.

‘For he has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you."  So we can confidently say, "The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?"’ (Hebrews 13: 5-6 ESV)

Christmas is about Jesus.

Rejoice (be Christmas Happy) in that, and that alone.

And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace among those with whom he is pleased!" (Luke 2: 13-14 ESV)

 

Letting go

Chatting with my friends I am starting to realize that many of us have been blindsided by an aspect of parenthood that we never heard about in advance.  Parenting adult children is hard. 

When they are infants they are completely dependent on us.  That is daunting, but as they (surprisingly) survive and thrive we start to get smug.  Then we begin to work on molding their behaviors.  We are driven by the desire for them to make a good impression. Life is wonderful when people say "you have a nice family" and sucks when a child throws a tantrum in the supermarket.   Their lives are full of promise and who I am is wrapped in their potential success.

Sometimes we succeed in making them appear good - but in so doing we may be setting up trouble because it is their heart that really counts, not the behavior.  And they are more likely to learn (and rebel against) the latter not the former. 

All of this is exhausting and we can't wait for the next stage, until it comes. 

Early adulthood comes through like a tornado.  All of a sudden they are out of our control, independent, strong willed, and invincible, yet with brains that are still not fully developed.  Some do well and we can glow in their glory.  But some make decisions that are counter to our core values and it wracks our very being.  And there is not much we can do about it but hide and hurt.

But what is the bible truth?

Look at Abraham, the epitome of faith, and consequently the father of a nation.  The test that defined his success was that he trusted God with his son, by obeying an instruction to sacrifice him that seemed to contradict the promise that this child was the route to untold generations. Isaac had been borne after decades of waiting, well beyond normal fertility, making him miraculous. Also do not forget the love that Abraham would have had for any child. The scope of his sacrifice is indescribable. The burden, cost and side effects were enormous, indicating that Abraham’s trust in God’s ability to overcome the consequences was also enormous. And that is precisely where God wanted him.

God forced Abraham to find his fulfilment in God, by letting go of his child.  It does not mean that his love of, or concern for, the child was any less, but he had to let God be responsible for Isaac’s destiny.  That hits home to me.  Bullseye.

So where do I go from here?

·       Love, teach, encourage, care for and exhort them, without qualification
·       Pray for them unceasingly, but that does not mean nagging or panicking
·       Trust God with their souls and their paths, remembering that He loves them more than I
·       Continue to fulfil my own ministry in obedience to Him